It’s one big carnivorous dinosaur trying to kill and eat another big carnivorous dinosaur; how can you resist? To put it in human terms, try to imagine a scaly Donald Trump (not so difficult) fighting bare knuckle with a scaly Angela Merkel. Many among you will claim that such a match-up would be disgraceful and that no way on god’s green earth would you ever view it as you condone violence and love flowers and butterflies.
Come on now, that’s a load of auld bollox. You would all be glued to your screens to see if Merky could take him. OK, you might not watch if she decides to eat him, but you would certainly ask someone else about it if she did. Our species is pre-programmed for violence. That’s why Hollywood makes so much money from movies that show it. X-men? Violence. Indiania Jones? Violence. Breaking Bad, 24, Game of Thrones? Violence. Teletubbies? Viol… wait, no, that one’s just weird. Violence would be preferable to strangely coloured creatures spewing gibberish at your children. Which brings us back to Donald Trump. He’s a dinosaur. A crotch-grabbing, Islamophobic, xenophobic, burrito chomping but Mexican-hating orange fossil who hoodwinked almost half a nation. The creatures shown in the following reconstruction of life during the Cretaceous period (112 – 93.5 million BCE) would have greater morality and scruples than will be found in DC these days.
So take a scally at the dinos and then consider the White House, and hope for an extinction event.
(By the way, Merkel would take him, even on an off-day, she would tear Donnie an orange new one)